I thought this year would be a good time to start a new segment called 'On my Mind.' I had a whole different topic prepared, but due to current circumstances, I will do a blog on friendship instead.
For those of you who don't believe in a Higher Power, please indulge this post of mine and accept me for who I am.
Friendship is defined as the personal relationship of two individuals. I say, that friendship goes deeper than that. Friendship is a God given blessing to us mortals on earth. Living day to day on our world is tough, and today's world is so stressful. Friendship gives us that taste of unconditional love that rules the Other Side and Heaven itself.
Friendship in its highest form is accepting that individual for who they are. Unfortunately, we are mortals, and our mortal minds bring in some pretty nasty emotions when it comes to love of any kind.
I have always said this earth is Kindergarten in the grand scheme of Heaven. Those of us on this planet, whether it is our first time or 100th time are here because we cannot graduate from Kindergarten. How embarrassing is that? But God knows and sees all things. God foresaw this and so He continually puts his older wiser spirits here to help us. We must all thank God for that blessing!
I have found a blog of pure hatred against me. Do not blame this individual. I do not. I have told her I would expect no less than her defense of a friend. This person has a right to her feelings and anger, and expressing them in her way.
However, I find it totally wrong to divulge publicly any information that in friendship was given to her privately, and I respectfully request she withdraw that statement.
Who's to blame here? There is no blame. Life happens. Changes occur. I was accused of having a new friend and dropping an old friend. This is incorrect. I do not let go of friends easily. I have already stated that I see friendship as a gift from God, and I would never throw that gift out casually. I tormented over this decision before I put it to action, and there are those friends of mine who know this.
Did I quit being friends with someone? Yes, I did. I tried in many ways to bring up my frustrations for certain actions. I finally couldn't take it anymore. If there are two things I continually strive for in my earthly state it is tolerance and patience, and I tell all of you now, I have not conquered them. And this is what happened in this situation. But we all have our faults, don't we?
When I couldn't take anymore of what was irritating me, I did shut the door on that friend. I will not go in to what was the cause. I do not publicly divulge what friends give to me in secret. Was this right or wrong? Only God knows the answer. Even I don't know, but to see it from my perspective, you must walk in my shoes.
The saddest part of all this is that I am no longer friends with 3 people - 3 close friends that I loved dearly, and part of me always will. I have moved on.
I will not retaliate in any way, nor continue this war further. I laid down my sword against those I love a long time ago, before this battle began. Do I forgive and forget? I forgive all, including myself in most circumstances. I cannot forgive mentioning someone I love very much and accusations of our relationship that I am sure came from bitter anger. But I can forgive that this person was in a bitter place at the time of that statement.
I harbor no hard feelings towards anyone. To me, forgetting means getting on with my life, and that is what I am doing.
There is no war here.
There is no hatred here.
There is only blatant refusal by 3 of us to one of God's greatest gifts. The 4th person involved has not shown bitterness nor dropped any friendship, nor is it in her heart to do so. We 3 will be held accountable for this action, and for allowing negative energies into our lives and the lives of those we love.
This matter is over. I must face my God someday and look at all the good and the bad in my life, as must we all.
Matthew 5:16 'Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in Heaven.'
I continue to strive for the above, but I am, after all, in mortal form, and so it is true that we are Spiritual beings (divine sons and daughters) striving to be mortal.
Psalm 82:6 "I have said, Ye are gods: and all of you are the children of the most high."
Let the bitterness end. The carrying of negative energy is a burden to our souls. Love is light, therefore, never tedious to carry.
I hold no animosity towards anyone. I only continue to walk forward as I feel I must. I will continue to grow and every experience becomes part of that. As Kirk once told Sybok, 'I need my pain. My pain makes me who I am.' It is one of my favorite Star Trek moments, and the clip is below.
To my three lost friends: I will remember only our good times. I will feel the loss of friendship. I will buffer the negativity and hatred thrown at me for it is your right to throw it and my right to not accept it. I see nothing to forgive or forget from any of us; for each step, each word, each thought lives and will live until our reckoning time.
Again, I request you remove the statement against the one person not involved in any of this.
To all my current friends, I ask forgiveness that your spirits and your energies have been pushed into any part of the crumbling of this friendship.
May God fill us all with His light and love so that our lights will shine stronger, and animosity will be put out.
LHR, my dear friends; love, honor, and respect.

22 comments:
I believe that if any of us can find one true friend in this life then we are indeed blessed. We should cherish him/her. Don't worry, Donna; you have friend's. It hurts to lose others but you are never truly alone.
Roger, I find your comment uplifting, and it has put a smile on my face. Thank you for your comment and for your friendship.
Wonderful post and I do hope the negativity towards you ceases. You are a wonderful soul and a true friend of mine, I can tell you that. I will always have your back.
Yes, sweet Ange, I know that. Thank you for your comment.
So sorry to hear about the drama :(
It's always a terrible thing to loose a friendship, especially under unhappy circumstances. I have had it happen to me before (both offline and on) and have always tried to look at it as it must have been time for us (the friends) to part company and move on for whatever reason, and though it could have been a better parting, it is as it is and the only thing to do is, as you've said, move forward. hopefully everyone involved can see that, too.
Friendships can be complicated and often go through phases. I am sorry to hear that you have been going through a difficult time. Some friends are only with us for a period of time. It is important to enjoy every minute while it's here. Best of luck!
~Jess
http://thesecretdmsfilesoffairdaymorrow.blogspot.com
Hope time will heal all wounds.
Joleene, it is sad to lose a friendship, but I look at it as you do - it was meant to be. You cannot fight change for sure. Thank you for your comment.
Fairday, thank you for commenting. You are right. It is complicated, but we must make the best of the good times.
The Desert Rocks, you are a rock, my dear, thank you for your comment. Time has yet to fail to heal all wounds. This is just one sand in the ocean of our world's history.
I've had to walk away from people who I thought were my friends, but who only wanted to hurt me. That they were family members makes it feel like a personal failure. I depend on God's forgiveness that it was I who closed the door. I pray that they will find happiness and fulfillment, because their attacks on me really stemmed from their own unhappiness.
Donna, I'm sorry you are going through this. I hope you and your friends (current and former) can move past this soon.
Hello Donna I’m so sorry things are tough for you just now. I called in to tell you I had passed the Liebster Blog Award on to you then I read your post and decided it was probably the wrong time. Then I thought about it some more and decided it's probably exactly the right time. Thanks for being such a wonderful friend.
I'm sorry this has happened to you, Donna. It does hurt to lose those you considered friends. But I agree that negativity wears you down, and there are times when it's better to cut your losses and move on.
Karla, thank you so much for your comment. I sympathize with you. There will always be times with families and friends where you feel you must move on, and it is difficult to do so.
Kelly, thank you for your comment. Thank you for your hope. I too wish this.
Barbara, you are such a caring person and such a wonderful friend too. Thank you for the award. You are right. It is the right time.
Nancy, thank you for your comment. Thank you for seeing that negativity is wrong, and that sometimes you just have to cut your losses.
In time, it will all be good.
Donna - I'm so sorry to hear you are still experiencing such distress in this matter. The comments posted here are testament to the friends you do have. Let them keep you in a circle of friendship and support and allow time and the natural healing process take care of the rest - Sharon
Shelly, thank you for your comment, and you are so right.
Sharon's Sunlit Memories, I sooooo love your blog. Thank you for your kind words. It is the circle of love friends provide that can heal all wounds.
Donna, when we live and love intensely, the fallout can also be highly emotional. Add to that the hyper-accessible blogosphere to use as a soapbox, and the trouble is magnified.
You have taken the best approach, and I pray it will lead you to complete peace about the situation.
I also wanted to thank you for visiting and commenting on my blog.
Swoosh by Scrollwork, what a beautiful loving comment. Thank you so much. And I loved visiting your wonderful blog.
Gosh I hope this isn't a blog I follow...I wouldn't have commented on the issue at all if I knew it involved you. I have experienced drama of my own and people manipulating online situations by shooting their mouths off. I think it is completely tactless to post personal info about someone else and especially to make hints here and there, knowing full well that the person being written about might come across the post. I certainly hope this drama dies down for you very soon! I'm trying hard to remain neutral w/these types of situations, but I am getting very tired of the high school (or as you say Kindergarten) drama, and am wondering who my real friends are at times. One thing I know is you have been a very kind and suppotive friend to me, so I wish you the best!
Christina, I am your friend and have enjoyed our friendship. I first got online for writing groups. Then I found your blog, The Blog Entourage, and I realized you loved crafts and baking too. Then I saw the online potential of finding other crafters, bakers! You have been a very supportive friend to me too. Thank you for your kind comment.
i am grateful to have made you as a new friend. i am sorry for your troubles with these old friends. i believe friends come in and out of our lives for a reason, often unknown. sometimes when the season is over, so is the friendship. it does not negate what happened during the friendship.
i also believe that forgiveness and mercy are about the person offering forgiveness, not the receiver. And forgiveness and mercy are unearned.
good luck to you on your new path
Pammy Pam, how I love our new friendship. You see the picture of life so clearly. Thank you so much for your comforting comment and for becoming my friend.
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